I want to be happy. I want to be happy with myself, and the world around me. I want to look in the mirror and feel OK. I don't want to feel fat. I want to feel beautiful, and lovable. I want to live my life each day, and find beautiful things. I want to eat three meals a day, and drink my coffee in the morning and my tea at night. I want to play tennis, and piano. I want to spend my time doing glorious things. Things that make me happy. I want to be with my friends, I don't want to push people away anymore. I want to believe in myself. I want to take a risk, get out of my comfort zone. I want to feel a little less comfortable than I am. But I want to be comfortable and happy with myself. People can tell, when your happy with yourself. They can feel it. It's in your energy. NOT in how you look. I want to forget autopilot and actually live my life. I want to listen music, read books, watch movies. I want to live. I don't want to wear myself out with pain of the past. The past is done, I'm ready to live for now. I want to be free with myself, and free with the world. I want to speak my opinion. i want to get sleep tonight. Do yoga in the morning and eat. I want to eat. I want to lose weight too. But the healthy way, I don't want to kill myself. I want to live past 20. I want to be healthy and glowing, not sad and droopy. I want to live. I do, I really do this time. I don't want others to control me. I'm ready to go live now, I'm ready to piece myself back together. I'm ready for something to go right. I'm ready to be happy. I'm ready.
10000% yes.
ReplyDeletei think you should stop worrying so much about the future and about your weight and stuff. i mean, you should enjoy the moment now. and it kinda scares me cause ive seen a picture of you on your other blog and you're super skinny. so i don't get why you want to lose more weight. you're already too skinny for your age. it's not healthy you know. (this is not a hate message but i just want to help you out) so do whatever you want with it but i hope you get it. x
ReplyDeleteI recently started reading your blog and when I came across this post, I was amazed because I feel the exact same way as you. I want to be healthy but I still want to lose weight in a healthy way though. I want to live my life especially now since I'm young, but I also want to make it to 20 and 30 and beyond.
ReplyDeleteI'm just not sure if I can.
Good luck<3