people like me. i know they do. they like me but im not good for them. im a piece of chocolate cake. or a fresh baked batch of cookies. or maybe a strawberry shortcake. im good, but not good for you. for anybody. but the thing is, and it gets me everytime, is that im good for you. only you. and you. people like you. you can tell they do. but your not good for them. except for me. your good for me. your good for me in a way that nobody else is. you are. and i might not always like you. in fact, most of the time(or atleast in the past) i've always despised you. but you've always been good for me. even when i didn't believe you were. we fit. and we are perfect in this completely imperfect way. and it just works. we work.

i don't understand. who i am, or what im doing here. im just here. with you. doing whatever we do when its me and you. and we let the world soak into us. but we don't understand. why we were chosen. why we like the feeling. of experience, of life. we are just humans, complicated animals. roaming the world. letting the leaders make the decisions for us. we really aren't that important. and deep down, we know we never will be. but when we're together, it's like we have a future. like there is a reason for life. like what im doing today, will get me somewhere. and maybe thats the problem. we live off lies. one big fucking lie. and its ok for awhile. until its not.
until you go away.

Can you lie next to her
And give her your heart, your heart
As well as your body
And can you lie next to her
And confess your love, your love
As well as your folly
And can you kneel before the king
And say I’m clean, I’m clean

But tell me now, where was my fault
In loving you with my whole heart
Oh tell me now, where was my fault
In loving you with my whole heart

A white blank page
and a swelling rage, rage
You did not think
when you sent me
to the brink, to the brink
You desired my attention
but denied my affections, my affections

So tell me now, where was my fault
In loving you with my whole heart
Oh tell me now, where was my fault
In loving you with my whole heart

Aah, aah...
Lead me to the truth and I
will follow you with my whole lie
Lead me to the truth and I
will follow you with my whole lie
Aah, aah...

mumford and sons- literally wicked awesome.

im in this place, this good place. its happy. happier than i've been in awhile. the people, the places, the conversations. it's good. it's the way i want it. i never thought it would be this easy, to get where i am. but all of a sudden, it just popped up. out of nowhere. like a jack in the box that somebody else wound up. but really, i should of seen this day coming. it was so easy. i just decided that i didn't care anymore, about the stupid people. about the people that hurt me. about the places where everything went wrong. i let go, i moved on. and suddenly, everything was ok. and now i'm happier than ever. so happy that i just want to hug everything in pure delight, just because i can. just hugs, hugs and more hugs. every day, every minute. wrapped up in somebodies arms. anybodies. but in this place, this overly happy place, where the equation equals the right amount-im scared. so scared. frightened. like i don't want to take it overboard. because whenever you go up, you have to go down. i'm scared i'll lose it all. that everything and everybody that makes me happy, will decide that i don't make them happy. and they'll leave. and i'll be crying, because i thought i had them. i thought they wanted me. but they didn't. and it'll be a terrible surprise. it's like im just waiting for the egg to crack, for all the happiness and glitter to spill through in one big rush and i won't have enough time, or energy, to catch it. it's all so scary. and i sit here, and i think about this. maybe a little too much, but thats just me. i just am so happy and so scared at the same time. please, please don't let me lose you.

i like small boobs.
i like hardcore concerts with mosh pits.
i like men.
i like college.
i like Mike's Hard Lemonade.
i like braids.
i like the sky.
i like December.
i like pianos.
i like the ocean.
i like second chances.
i like forgiveness.
i like High School football games.
i like new computers.
i like modesty.
i like fancy cameras.
i like walls covered in pictures.
i like the color yellow.
i like love.
i like a child's artwork.
i like inspiration.
i like people with a different point of view.
i like traveling.
i like reading.
i like washing my face.
i like laughing so hard i cry.
i like not making sense.
i like girls who give long hugs.
i like parties.
i like cupcakes.
i like magazines.
i like acorns.
i like poetry.
i like making lists.
i like thinking.
i like glitter.
i like looking in the mirror, and believing i'm beautiful.
i like lemonade.
i like things.
Obviously.

i'm never good enough for myself. every glance in the mirror, every failed attempt, everything. i'm never ever good enough. for once, i want to be good enough. i want to look in the mirror and think "your alright". not "oh my, just LOOK at you. your gross." but i think it anyways, cause i just can't get past it. i can't get past how fat i am. or how ugly. or how not worth it. i just am stuck in this terrible place that nobody ever wants to be in. but guess who's in it? me.
fuck me.

New Dress A Day

This Blog is all about one woman's search for happiness.
Through vintage clothing and a scissors.

It's definitely one of the most inspirational and creative blogs I've found.